Looking Forward

Dear Caroline,

The New Year always forces me to look back on the current year and look forward to the upcoming one. The year that was 2012 was full of quiet expectations with many of them not coming to pass. So no more resolutions for this girl! This year I think I’ll state my hopes for the New Year, as we are one year closer to your arrival.

• I hope for health, happiness, and harmony. I am considering adding more exercise into my life and being more responsible with taking vitamins and such. I hope for continued happiness within our marriage and improved harmony between our families.
• I would also love to travel more with Thomas before we have children. We’re making big plans. So big in fact, they are probably too huge to accomplish right now.
• The biggest goal I have for myself is to successfully graduate with my Master’s degree. I am really ready to be a college graduate-again!

Wish #66: I wish for you to be able to make goals and be responsible and hard working to accomplish them.

Love always

Settling DOWN and Growing UP

Dear Caroline,

Two thousand and twelve. This was supposed to be the last year on Earth according to the Mayans. But we survived the apocalypse safe and sound. After the year that was 2011, it was kind of a let down. A girl doesn’t get married, graduate, and start a full time job every day. This year was all about settling down and growing up.

I am now a second year teacher with such a fun and amazing little class. These kiddos are such personalities that it will be impossible to forget them. I can’t wait to continue to see them learn and grow. I love my job- most of the time.

I am also now a second year wife. We are still very happy and growing everyday. By no means is our relationship perfect, but what relationship is? We love each other very much and cannot wait for the rest of our lives together.

The biggest change in our lives is my enrollment in my Masters program. This was a decision that we prayed about, fought about, and even cried about. In all honesty, I never wanted to get my masters, but it was a great decision financially. I would rather be this stressed out before we have children and use the raise to prepare for you. It is not something that is easy, but things that are worth having never are.

Looking back at my resolutions, I didn’t accomplish any of them the way that I intended. I’ve read the right number of books, but it wasn’t over the course of the year. We are still not going to church or practicing the way I would like, and we still do not have joint checking. What can I say? We’re a work in progress.

Wish #65: I wish for you to be ever satisfied yet never finished growing.

Love always

Birthday Pity Party

Dear Caroline,

I would like to go on record for being the one person that hates their birthday. I’ve already talked about how I love to do birthdays big for family members and that is completely true. But I hate my birth date. That is because my birthday is on January 1^st aka the most inconvenient birth date besides Christmas. I am not going to lie, it is THE reason I wanted to get married in the summer.

I am not a materialistic person. I don’t own purses or lots of shoes or great clothes. I don’t wear jewelry, make-up, or perfume. What I like the most is being with my friends and family. But because my birthday is on a holiday it is always inconvenient for others to get together. I also hate the idea of postponing my birthday so I’m just out of luck.

My least favorite birthday occurred when I was turning six years old. My parents had decided (again) to postpone my birthday party with my friends until after the first of the year. We were going to celebrate at our local skating rink when…. Dun dun dun…. my mom discovered I had the chicken pox. It was miserable. I was itchy and scratchy and just gross. I remember being so upset that there would be no party because of the stupid pox. I was just flat disappointed.

Lately has also been a disappointment because Thomas has had to work every. single. birthday. that we have been together so my birthday has never been properly celebrated. I kinda hate my birthday.

Wish #64: I hope for you to have a nice, convenient birthday far away from Christmas.

Love always

Roots and Wings

Dear Caroline,

Heavy. That is the word that I would describe the kind of discussions Thomas and I have been having lately. I can’t deny it anymore… We are grown ups. We are so blessed to have found each other at such a young age, but because of that adulthood has kind of snuck up on us. I can’t believe that I’m at the age where we’re buying cars, talking pets, thinking about moving, and where we are going to live. And all of these decisions will affect you!

First and foremost, we bought your dad his first truck in quite some time. He loves it and we feel as though we got a great deal on it. But we might not feel that way come tax and title time!

We’re talking pets! At Thanksgiving we were blessed enough to be able to visit Thomas’ family in his hometown. His aunt had the most precious baby in the form of a Maltese puppy. (I guess I should be happy it wasn’t a real baby, huh?) Since then we’ve been doing research on bringing one into our family. I’d love a rescue but we’ll see. I’m not much of a dog person so I hope that this is a smooth transition.

The biggest and heaviest conversation of all is the idea of moving. Currently, we’re living in my hometown. I love the idea of roots and traditions. But I just cannot believe that this city is our forever city. We are both so ready for a new start nearer to a church community and the things we are interested in. There are also huge limitations living and working in a city where you grew up in that people still treat you like you’re sixteen years old. We’ve started looking at other areas in our state. We are prayerfully thinking and considering our options trusting in our Father the entire process. After all it isn’t just our future, but yours as well. You are so loved already baby girl.

Wish #63: I wish for you to have an avid and daily prayer life.

Love always

Reason for the Season

Dear Caroline,

Another Christmas has come and will soon be gone.

Christmas is a very complicated day for a lot of people, and I am beginning to think that I fall into this category. It is such a joyous time of year and that creates pressure for a perfect day.

I write letters to you to show you that the kind of person that I am now. And I am the kind of person that loves Christmas. I love the tree, the time spent with family, seeing the magic in my students’ faces, cookies, and the traditions. This can lead to expectations about the “stuff” of Christmas. This year we went without a lot of the stuff and I’ll be honest, I am disappointed. Christmas is one day out of the year that most people can expect to be happy. I wasn’t happy this year. This year I worked almost up til the date of Christmas and that might have had something to do with it. But I think that the most likely reason is that I’ve been focusing too much on the stuff and not on the reason for the season.

We have really gotten lax about attending church. I don’t think we’ve been since last Christmas Eve. We didn’t even read the story of the Nativity this year as a family. But more importantly, we’ve let the relationship go as well. Christmas isn’t about the stuff. Its about celebrating the relationship that began on this day all those years ago. As your mother, I hope to build up my relationship with the Creator that gave me the desire to make you a part of our forever family.

Wish #62: I wish for you to always remember the reason for the season even if it is hard.

Love always